Wii U Sports is Awesome!

Wii U Sports is Awesome!


It’s not for real gamers unless, they are shooting and killing. SHUT UP!!!!! Wii Sports was a massive success. Until people realized, it got boring after 5 minutes Boring! I’m too old for this sh*t! But not anymore. (gasp) Introducing Wii U Sports for the Wii U We’ve taken the original Wii sports games and fixed them, so they don’t suck anymore. Like everyone’s favourite, Wii Tennis. Hit the power-up! (in-game voice) Machine gun! (gun cocking) (rapid gunfire and laughing maniacally) Haha, take that Gramps! (rapid gunfire intensifies) Grandpa died! Me next! Me next! Another Wii Sports classic we brought to the Wii U is golf. (calm music) (fighting metal music and grunting) (explosion) Oh! What happened? And NOW, you can get revenge on your family for putting you in that retirement home with Wii U boxing. Finish Him! (grunt) (cheering) But we didn’t just remake all your old favourites. We’re also featuring a bunch of new sports to play like Wii U Gladiator. (traditional music) (slice!) Ha! Eat sh*t and die, Dad! And to really please the guys, there’s Wii U mud wrestling. This is so hot! And finally, we’re bringing one of the most popular sports to the Wii U, juggling. Juggling is my favourite sport. (screaming) Oops! I just killed my son! And now for added realism, if you die the in the game, the controller will inject you with a deadly neurotoxin and kill you in real life! What?! (chainsaws whirring and screaming) But don’t worry, you can use the Wii remotes as defibrillators. Oh, thank God. Clear! Oh! This game is so realistic. Wii U sports is the best! It sure is. And you better keep playing it or we’ll kill you again! (gasp) (sobbing) W̳̗ͤ̽̋͂̚i͉͓ͣ̐ͦ̌̚͠i̷̫̟̰̫ͫ͋ͬ̾͑ ͧ̈́̎̓ͅȖ̵͈̦̫̮̗̳ͧ̍̐̚ ̩̞͙͌̾̐͊S͓̮̣̜̹͑ͭ̌͘p̶̥̪̱̣̘ͪ̿ͮͩͮ̅o̢̖̰͔̞̜̟͈͒ͮ̓̓̇r̞͔̜̦̮ͤ̆̌ͨ͋̎̈t̰̗͑ͥ̓́s͛́̍̇̏͗́ ̻̺̺ͮ͠f̨̳̒ͧ͋̀ȍ̴̳̯̝̻͔r̸̞͓͉̹ͭͥͦ͒ͤ͗ ̱̺͖͎̽t͑̊h̰̗̙̾̐̎̚ͅę̮̣̳͕ ͈̪͔̤̆̌͂ͯ̔ͩW̫̪̮̮͗͒͋ͧi͂̔͂̚i͠ ̩̟̹̈́ͤͮ̈́͂̈́̀̀U̙̠͂̈̔ͩ͒ͤ͌,̤͎ͣͯ̈̑ ̻̭̣̝̖͈̲ͨͭ̅͘y̵̗o̲͇̫̱ͬų̖’̯̪̾̐͋ͬ͞l̵̹͖̖̻ͧ̀l̖͈̹̯̱̦̈̇̿ͅ ̽ͩ̓ͨ͗͒ͪn͓͈̖͓̗̫͈̑e̜̩̼̯̾̾̅̃ͬ̇͗ͅv̗̙̟̳͚̫͛̈́̍̃ͧe̡̙͚̖̝͎̥̾̀͊̾r̼ ̱̲̥̞̝̙͑̾ͤ͊ͮͤ̚ͅw̋͂͒a̓ͣͧ́͏̹̞ͅn̢͓͓̠̘̗t̛̠̗͖̦ͦ̿̈͑̐̔͊ ͧͥ̈ͨ͊͒t̆ͨ͡o̗͓̺͈̯̫̜̊ͨͬ̂̍̽͊͘ ̱̙̮̍ͯ̆̇̕ŝ̵͈̲͕̰̫̿ͮ͐t̰̤̙̆́͘ǫ̹̮̭̖̩͆ͫ͑ͭp̝̟̝͌͆ ͅp̲̞̞̝͎̭̙ͮl͈̼̃̍̈́a̸̘̜̝͇̝̣ͫ͂͆ͧy̋ͭ͗ͯi̶̤̮̤͔̘͌̂ͪǹ͕͎̻̐̏̂͞g̟̩͈͖͙.͌̍́̿̑ (in despair) Why?! To see behind the scenes footage, bloopers and to find out what this noise is… Click the link in the description below! How’s that banana, son? It’s good. Thanks for subscribing! Aw, I can’t wait to play Wii U mud wrestling! Heh heh heh! I mean…uh… I have a girlfriend, I don’t need that crap!

100 Replies to “Wii U Sports is Awesome!”

  1. If Wii U Sports was actually released and the ESRB saw it, there’s no way it could escape an E10+ or T.

    Here’s what I think the content descriptions would be:

    Intense Violence
    Animated Blood
    Mild Suggestive Themes

    If this was submitted to the App Store, it’d probably get a 12+ or 17+.

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