Tonight Show Fallon Five: Desus & Mero Rename Winter Olympic Sports

Tonight Show Fallon Five: Desus & Mero Rename Winter Olympic Sports

-There are 15 different sports
in the Winter Olympics, and sometimes
it can be very hard to keep track of which is which. That might be because
some of their names don’t really do a good job
describing what the sport is. So here to rename some of
the Winter Olympic sports, please welcome the hosts of
“Desus and Mero” on Viceland, Desus and Mero! [ Cheers and applause ] Always nice to see you. That’s what I’m talking about.
Desus and Mero. -We’re here.
-Thank you. -We’re back.
-Thank you for being here, guys. Are you ready to
update these names? -Yes!
-Let’s do it. -Let’s do it, bro.
We are millennials. We like to rename things
that are already named. [ Laughter ]
-Okay, here we go. Let’s start with
cross-country skiing. What should we call that?
-I had to think deep on this. I want to call it
“boring skiing.” -Yes.
-Okay, perfect. Yeah, we can do that.
-“Squawking.” -That’s great.
How about — how about curling? -“Aggressive janitoring.” [ Laughter and applause ]
You know what I’m saying. -I have another name for that. I’d like to call it
“Oh, she’s coming over soon? All right, let me clean up.” [ Laughter ] Y’all know what it is. -How about speed skating? -All right, that’s just
“racing in Spanx.” [ Laughter ]
-Okay. How about this? Luge? -“Yeah, look,
we’re really good friends and very comfortable
with each other.” [ Laughter ]
-That’s all it is, just friends. -“He lays on top of me.
We do our sport thing. That’s it.”
-“We’re doing a sport thing.” -Wow. Wow. -How about bobsledding?
-Come on, man. [ Jamaican accent ]
“Cool runnings.” [ Laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ] -What about snowboarding? -“Dude, I was gonna ski, but I can only afford
this one big ass ski.” [ Laughter ] -What about Nordic combined?
-All right. I would like to call this
“this is not a real sport. You just made this up
for the Winter Olympics, and I can’t prove that.” [ Laughter ]
-This is good. Ski jumping? -“Noooope!” [ Laughter ]
-Not safe at all. Not safe at all.
-I wouldn’t do it either. -No, no, not at all.
-Finally, ice hockey. -“White people basketball.” [ Laughter ]
-That’s a good one. That’s a good one.
-All right, there you go. [ Applause ] Our thanks to Desus and Mero right there,
ladies and gentlemen! [ Cheers and applause ] That is our show tonight.
Thanks for watching, everybody. I hope to see you tomorrow! Bye-bye, everybody. [ Cheers and applause ] ♪♪

100 Replies to “Tonight Show Fallon Five: Desus & Mero Rename Winter Olympic Sports”

  1. WTF White people basketball? Didn't just yesterday 4 people got banished from Chicago Blackhawks arena for chanting basketball but it's cool when another race says it?

  2. cross-country BOOOOO like supermen trico BLU- lagoone)) cerling – i wash cleaned FLOOR like this 2 and IM WINNED)) oooo LUGE if gerl be down im im im OK)) Bronx)) not bad like you mama))

  3. Can anyone deny that flooding every White country in the world (and ONLY White countries) with tens of millions of non-Whites and forcing their assimilation into the White community is an act of genocide?
    Black countries will remain Black, and Asian countries will remain Asian.
    White countries are the ONLY countries to be affected by this.
    But, rather than genocide, the word that anti-Whites use to describe this program is "diversity."
    Diversity means chasing down White flight.
    Anti-racist is a codeword for anti-White.

  4. Why is it ok for 2 black people to call ice hockey white people basketball and not ok for 2 white people to shout basketball at a black hockey player in Chicago?

  5. I love that no you can tell Jimmy thinks these guys are hilarious. He's had them on quite a bit makes me respect Jimmy way more

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