Come on England, come on… Come on, lads get
some weight into it! Come on get stuck in. Come on. Come on over here. Bloody hell! He’s broke his front teeth. You won’t want to see
no tarts for a week. How is he? He’s just a bit dazed. He’ll be alright though. It’s not to bad. How do you feel? You ought to charge more rent. I don’t mind telling you Mrs Hammond. But when I first came here
I thought I’d fallen easy. I don’t want a list
of my shortcomings. I’m only trying to show you where
you’re hurting yourself most. Can’t I talk to you just
for once as a person. If you listen to what I have to say.
I could really put you right. I wish you wouldn’t try
and work me into a fit. I’ve asked you before to
leave me alone, that way. I can’t stand it. How do you feel, Frank? You won’t be able to shoot your
mouth off like you used to… at least not for a few days. Can you fix me up with a dentist? I don’t know.
It’s Christmas you know, Frank. I want it tonight. Well, I… I can try. Tonight! Come on, you lot, let’s have you out! How do I look? I’ve seen worse. Go on, you’re dry. You going to Weaver’s
party tonight, Frank? I’ve been counting on it. I’d leave well alone if I were you. Weaver and parties. I’d get your mouth seen to
first it’s more important. How’s your Mrs Hammond? She’s alright. I bought some presents for her kids. Bet she won’t like it though. She doesn’t like me interfering. Hallo Frank. – How are you lad?
– Not now Johnson we’re in a hurry. – Oh Mr Weaver.
– Yes George. – Frank’s ready whenever you want him.
– Oh good. How’s it going Frank? I’m alright. Hello Maurice. What are
you coming in the car too. Oh I wouldn’t miss seeing Frank in
the chair. I might even get a camera. You can put your little
doggie in the boot, George. Right-Oh, Mr Weaver. What about your little dog, Frank? Go on in, Dad. That’s not very funny. Let’s have a look at you then. It’s not me, old lad it’s Frank here. Right. Come on.
I’ve a Member’s Ticket, that’ll be how you traced me.
I haven’t seen a match this season. Sit yourself down. It’s a mess.
They’ll have to come out. Six of them. It’s all I can do. Well, hasn’t Weaver
arranged to pay you? Oh, that’s not the point,
I’m afraid. He’ll need a plate. What of it? I can’t go making plates for him.
This is a Children’s Department. Well, kids have false teeth.
I know a couple who have. – Do you?
– All right, you do the pulling, get your mate to do the plate.
We’ll pay, never mind Weaver. It’s no party here,
let’s get on with it. Aye, you see, he’s in pain. It’ll be ten guineas. – Ten guineas?
– Take it or leave it. Come on, whatever the bloody price. It’ll have to be gas. Have you eaten recently? No, not since my dinner. Well, would you mind waiting outside? Go on, Maurice. Right. Could you put your hands
in your pockets?… That’s it. Sit tight. You’ll feel nothing. Breathe deeply. Sit tight. Keep your hands in your pockets. You’ll feel nothing. I’ve been thinking… why don’t we go for a walk? What on earth for? What do you want us to go walking
about in the bloody pitch dark for? Well, I like to talk to
someone when I’m walking. You know, your problems;
they’re sort of… You’ve plenty of friends. Here, look at this funny man. Here, you play with it. You must be mad to think I’d
go out there, walking with you. I don’t want you poking
your nose into my affairs. You won’t find me poking
my nose into yours. I have some pride left,
if you didn’t know. Don’t you want to be happy? If I’m left alone, I am happy. I don’t need you pushing in. I’m not pushing in! I’m just trying to be friendly. Well, I’m not going about all
day with a grin over my face – just to make you think I’m happy.
– I don’t mean laughing all the time. I mean, you just don’t look happy. It’s not a… not a question
of laughing all the time… You make me sick! All right, I am sick. I’m bloody
sick of living here, an’ all! Mr Machin,
that’s easily settled… don’t. Just stop living here.
We’ll be better off without you. Come on, open up! – What have you got in there.
– Come on! Come on, open up, you boss-eyed git! Oi, you and me. Catch it, Dad. Come on, open up!
The Manager’s expecting us. Come on, Jeff. Come on, open up! Jeff, come on. Excuse me. I’m with players. I’m with players! I’m sorry, Mr Johnson,
didn’t know it was you. Come on in. And now, ladies and gentlemen,
comes the big moment of the evening. The winners in tonight’s fifty-pounds
Freestyle Dance Contest: Miss Evie Turner and
Mr John Whittaker. As you may have noticed,
ladies and gentlemen, we’ve just been joined by a
party from another winning team of whom we’re all very proud…
our City Rugby League Team! Come on, the City! And now, I’m going to ask a
couple of these famous men to kindly step up here and present
the winners with their prizes. Len Miller and Maurice Braithwaite! Come on, Len, come on, Maurice. Just wait ’till I’ve
finished this half. Come on, Len! Ladies and Gentlemen: Len Miller,
Captain of the City, and Maurice Braithwaite. How do. Well, thank you, Len,
thank you, Maurice. And now, ladies and gentlemen… it’s on with the dance. It’s a general
Excuse Me, and may the best man win! Excuse me. Got this one. He just called a general Excuse Me. Do you want a thumping, love? Aye. Well, you’d better come
outside and Excuse Me there. Hold on a minute. Hold on! You… Now, what’s it all about, then? I was meaning to ask you. Well, what’s that? Your name is Johnson, isn’t it? Aye, that’s right. You’re a scout for the City. You could say so. Can you get me a trial? Aah! Now, wait! Wait a minute, lad. Why don’t you come and see me play? I need someone to cheer me. You can cheer yourself. You won’t catch me up there
freezing to death for an hour. It’s my first game;
a lot depends on it. – You don’t have to do it.
– It’s a job. If I play well and they sign me,
I might get three or four hundred quid. I’m sure they’ll give you all that. Well, that’s just the sort
of encouragement I need. Come and see, I’d like you to come. If I wanted to go
I would; I’ve said it. I don’t want to. Wish us luck, then. All that’s coming your way. I don’t wish you my luck. I’ll have to make do with
my own, then, won’t I? That’s it, Frank! Well done, lad! What’s his name, Wade? Er… Machin. Er, Frank Machin. Oh, Charles is here. Hallo, Charles. – Charles.
– Gerald. Pass the ball, Gower. Pass the bloody ball, you nit! Pass the ball, you git! Come on, Gower, get after it! Let’s have that bloody
ball in future, you nut! Get stuffed. Come on, Gower,
get rid of that bloody ball! – Come on, Gower!
– Pass the ball, man! Bloody hell! Hey, Gower, what’re you
playing at, you bloody frog? Trainer, trainer! Come here. What’s your name? How do you mean, Ref? I didn’t do it. – I never touched him.
– You can tell that to Rugby League Chairman. Look, I swear to God,
I never touched him. Look at my bloody fists,
there’s no blood on them! – Go on, get off! Off!
– Takes some beating… bloody hell! He’s not fit to be
on a football field. Aye. Don’t come back here again! They got the wrong man there. You think so, Mr Slomer? Of course. It’s as plain
as the nose on your face. That’s not what I call football. It’s a rough game, Charles. Personally, I like to see a man
playing as if he really meant it. You played a blinder,
Frank! You played a blinder. You enjoyed it? Come on, lad,
they’ll be all over you. I was sitting right int’
middle of Committee. Don’t get excited, Dad.
Come on, I’ll buy you a drink. What are you having? I’ll have a beer. Two beers, please. You won’t find them no
different from me, lad. Maybe they won’t show it.
Naturally, they… they shot it like me. Allow me. – What?
– No, allow me. I really do insist. A double, Bob. Well, you played a
good game today, Frank. Aye, he played a blinder. I wouldn’t worry about him,
he’s a bit soft. How’d you like the City? I’m getting the hang of it. Yes, I rather gathered that. Pity about Taffy Gower. What about him? They’ve taken him to hospital. I believe it was a broken nose. You know, for a little fellow
their hooker packs quite a punch. It’s bad luck. Yes, it is. You haven’t signed on here? No, they haven’t made
their minds up yet. Well, I don’t think they’ll
find that too difficult… do you? Goodbye, Frank. Who was it? You know, Frank. Who was it, Dad? Guess… Go on, have a guess. Who was it? That’s mean, Frank. That’s mean. Who was it, Dad? That’s mean. Why did you squeeze
my wrist like that? I don’t know. Why? Was it Weaver? You hurt me, you know. Just because it was Weaver. You get far too excited, lad. I thought you knew it was Weaver. I was surprised,
him talking to me like that. He must have been impressed. Do you think there’s something? Aye. Do you want me to come home with you? It’s no trouble… no trouble to me. Aye. Aye. Come if you like. Have some tea.
Mrs Hammond won’t mind. Bit of a coincidence,
me knowing her husband. Yep. Not that well, mind;
maybe only a year afore he died. I say, them’s not his
boots, are they? What’s she keep ’em for? I don’t know. How long have you lived here, Frank? Oh, about five or six months. She had some kids, didn’t she? – Aye.
– How does she manage? She does all right… she does all right. She just… put up the shutters
and stopped living. My wife left me ten year ago. Isn’t it warm, Mum? Warm…? You know we can’t use
all that coal, Mr Machin. Don’t worry, I’ll fetch you
a load home from t’ pit. Mr Johnson, this is Mrs Hammond… Ian, and Lynda. We haven’t much in for tea. Don’t boast about it. Mr Johnson might get
the idea we’re poor. You sit down. All right, there, young love?
Ooh, you’re getting very heavy! I know! Tell me… what have you been doing? Been out shopping with me mam. Have you now.
And where else did you go? We went to see our dad. How did the match go? Did you win? He played a blinder, Missus,
he played a blinder. Oh. Did he? And have they signed him on? Nay, it’s not as quick as that. But after today’s match he’ll be
able to ask anything he likes. Isn’t that right, Frank? Frank, isn’t that right? I don’t know! Aye, it won’t pay them to
turn you down, you know, lad. I’m sure they’ll give
him it, Mr Johnson. Aye, he’ll sail away. He’ll sail away. You’ll be very pleased. I’ll see you then, Dad. You don’t mind me helping you,
do you, Frank? Why do you say that? Well, you know… I, I mean… if I’m in
a position to help, I think it’s only right. Aye… I think it’s right. You don’t mind? No. Don’t know what you’re talking about! Oh… well, that’s all right, then. I’ll see you. You know, any… any time at all. Aye, see you, Dad. You play for nothing, then? I get amateur pay… thirty bob. That’s hardly a wage. Well, they pay you good money
when they sign you on. The old man treats you like a son. I… wouldn’t say that. I call
him ‘Dad’ because he’s old. I don’t mean that. – What do you mean?
– The way he treats you. The way he ogles you. He looks at you like a girl. Now, don’t come with that. He’s interested, that’s all. I’d say excited. Well, excited, then!
What are you getting on about? He hasn’t got much to get
excited about at his age. He’s done a lot for me. He’s never had a job
of work in his life. How do you know he’s never worked? Because I’ve got eyes. You just look at his hands. He’s got awful hands,
they’re all soft. What have hands got to do with it? He’s got awful hands…
I’ve got awful hands. We’re not all women. Well, it’s nothing to do with me. Your husband… I gather he worked at
Weavers Engineering? Who told you that? Johnson. Said he used to know him. He must have told you something else. No. I expect he thought it was very… chivalrous
of you, helping a widow, and all that… You reckon it’s nothing…
to you what people think. It isn’t. It’s bringing Eric’s name
into it I don’t like. You see, when Eric died… well, all my world went out. He used say he didn’t
know why he was living. He used to say: ‘How was I ever made alive?’ When he went like that, I felt
I hadn’t been proper to him. I hadn’t made him feel
as if he belonged. I shouldn’t be telling
you this, should I? I… I don’t mind. No… I mean, you being what you are. Self-reliant; all that cockiness. You don’t seem worried like Eric was. I… I only mentioned it because… well, because I saw you
polishing them boots. Is there anything the matter
with me cleaning them? No… No… like I said… I don’t mind. A thousand pounds. A thousand? That’s a very large sum for a
player just entering the game. I want one thousand down. Now, look here, Frank… we’re not providing
a comprehensive insurance policy. That’s a very fair
offer Mr Riley’s made. I want a thousand pounds… down. Now, look, we’re not trying to
put anything over on to you. I wish you’d get that into your head.
But we are representing other people, we’re responsible for investing
their money soundly. I can’t change my mind.
I feel I’m worth it. What does Mr Slomer think? My only surprise is that you’re
discussing such a figure at all. What figure would you suggest? I’m far from convinced that he’s the
kind of player we want, in the first place. You realise,
as I’m sure Frank does… that we’re not the only
club that’s interested? We’re not here to worry about other clubs.
We’re here to decide whether we want him. Well, you’ve had my opinion. Frank, could you wait
outside a minute? How goes it, Frank? Have they fixed you up? They’re talking about it now. Let me get you a drink.
Whiskey? Whiskey, Bob. I’m Phillips, from the City Guardian. You needn’t take it seriously. Why not? It’s only a game, old sport.
It’s all a game… for Weaver’s benefit. You mean, they act like
that just for Weaver? Well, it’s his cash they’re
dishing out. His or Slomer’s. If Slomer hates your guts,
Weaver ‘ll buy you out of spite. I see you’ve got a bruise coming. No, Weaver wouldn’t have you up
here just to say ta-ta, you know. Frank. What do you aim to do,
Frank, if we don’t sign you? Don’t know. Carry on as I am. Can’t you change your mind
about splitting the payment? No. No, one thousand down. Well, I’m afraid there’s
nothing else for it, then. You’re not going to sign me? That’s it. We’ll have to. Congratulations, Frank. Congratulations, Frank. Hold it. That’s it. Well, aren’t you going to read it? Aye. Well, don’t spend it all at
once now, will you, lad? Well, Frank, what does
it feel like, lad? I don’t feel much. It’s all a bit quick; I’m afraid that’s my fault. I like
to get these things settled. I suppose you don’t mind. Not now, I don’t. Did you have any other offers? No… at least,
I didn’t hear anything. Well, if you do,
you’ll know what to say… property of the city. Best to make sure, Frank. Fairfax Street…
now, that rings a bell. Aye. A fellow called Hammond
used to live there. He got killed at your place… Weaver’s. I’ve digs with his widow. Hammond. Yes, Eric Hammond, wasn’t it? Yeah. Well, I remember the funeral. How’d he get killed? Quite nasty. He was working with a lathe. Very careless. He was using a hand-file. It shot off and stuck
half-way through him. We had half an idea he’d
done it on purpose. On purpose… Yes. Funny way to commit suicide. She didn’t get any compensation.
The case went against her. We gave her a bit… not much. End of the street, or the front door? End of the street will do. Right. – Good night, Frank.
– Good night, Mr Weaver. Frank! Hey, Frank! Hi, Dad. What are you doing down here, then? Did you sign?
Have they signed you on? They wouldn’t have me, Dad. They wouldn’t have me. You ought to have seen ’em. They’re round that Weaver like a… a pack of dogs around a bitch. I told them what to do with
their stinking, filthy bastard money. You haven’t done that? Aye. You’re not crying about it, are you? You’re not crying? So it was all for nothing, eh? Nay… Hey, Dad. I was only kidding you about it! I was only kidding. How much do you think it is? You tell me, Frank. You tell me. A thousand quid. Nay! Aye. – D’you want to see the cheque?
– Aye, could I see it? You and me, Frank… that’s us. How much of it do you want, Dad? Oh, no, Frank. What do you mean, ‘oh, no, Frank’? – Oh, no, Frank, I…
– Now, Dad, listen. I don’t en joy getting kicked about on a
football field for other people’s amusement. I only enjoy it if I’ve
been paid a lot for it. Now I want you to share some of this. No, Frank, I don’t want any of it. All right, then.
I’ll send you some of it. No, wait, Frank. I didn’t
do it for the money. That Johnson called earlier on. That friend of yours. I’ve just seen him. You mean he’s been waiting
all this time? It was hours ago. He likes to get out and about a bit. You should have friends your own age. I have. They’ve signed me on. Didn’t you hear what I said? Yes. You’ll be pleased. So will you when you
guess how much it is. Oh, I don’t know anything about it. Go on, have a guess. Just guess how much
you think I’m worth. Three pence? Now, careful, careful… you made a joke. You can’t go round cracking jokes like that,
you know… you might do yourself an injury. Well, come on, have a guess. Come on. No… Well, I’d better tell you
since you’re so keen. One thousand pounds. Oh… you’re a great ape. You don’t believe me? Look, I’ve got the cheque
here in my pocket. One thousand pounds in
letters and in numbers. Signed, sealed and delivered,
Frank Machin. They drove me home in their car…
a bloody Bentley! It’s very good. You don’t sound very
excited about it. It’s a bit more than I got
when my husband died. Well, isn’t that right
bloody handsome of you! You didn’t have to
do anything for it. You mean I didn’t have
to get killed for it! Some people have life made for them. That’s right, Mrs Hammond, and some
people make it for themselves. It’s about time you took that
ton of rock off your shoulders. And don’t wake me in the morning,
I might be dead! That money… does it mean you’ll be leaving now? No. I don’t think so. …keeping herself… You’re done. …so small small… You’d better get him off home. He’ll be
all right when he gets in the fresh air. Get him into bed. Doesn’t understand…
Keeping herself small… Ooh! Here, come on,
what’s the matter, Frank? She’s so… she’s so small. Oh, he’s all right…
he’s just full of gas, that’s all. Get hold of him… She’s so bloody small… Are you going to get in, Frank? She gives me nothing. She gives me bloody nothing! ‘If I were the marrying kind, ‘ ‘which thank the Lord I’m not, sir, ‘ ‘The kind of man that I would
wed would be a rugby fullback.’ ‘He’d find touch, ‘ ‘I’d find touch, ‘ – ‘We’d both find touch together…’
– Frank. ‘We’d be all right in the
middle of the night, find… ‘ Oh, the patient’s awake! We’ve heard all your subconscious
what-nots. Haven’t we, Mr Weaver? My carrier… What’s he want? My carrier. My carrier! Steady, lad, steady! Did he have a carrier? Is this it? What have you got in there, then? Presents. – What did you say?
– Presents! Come on. What do you think of it? – Have you bought it?
– Aye. It’s a bit of all right, isn’t it? You’re not going to leave
that thing there, are you? Why not? You won’t smile when you
come for a drive in it. ‘Ere, he can take you out on Sunday
afternoons now, Mrs Hammond! Don’t worry, you’ll never
get me to go in that thing. It’s like riding around
in your own front room! Come on, Ian, let’s come for a drive. Don’t mind your mother… come on. Watch your head. Hey, I want him for his dinner! Look, he’s got to get back to school! Don’t worry, I’ll take him
in this. We won’t be long. Frank, lad, we’re there. It’s Frank! Frank Machin! Come on, Frank. Hurray! Come on, show ’em your smile, Frank.
Come on, smile for them, Frankie! Ha, ha! You shouldn’t be here, lad.
Can I take you home? I’m all right, Dad. ‘…He’d push hard, ‘ ‘and I’d push hard, ‘ ‘We’d both push hard together.’ ‘And there we’d be in the
middle of the night, ‘ ‘pushing hard together.’
‘If I were the marrying kind…’ You’ve come, have you, Frank? How are you, then?
All right, darling? – D’you know where the bathroom is?
– Aye, it’s up them stairs, there. ‘He’d run hard, ‘ ‘and I’d run hard, ‘
‘We’d both run hard together…’ Come on, Frank. It’s me, Maurice. I know you’re in there,
you daft frog! What’s the matter? Sulking? Hey, Frank, come on out, will you! How far are we going? I thought we’d make a day of it. Go for a run in the country. You don’t mind, do you? We can’t very well
get out now, can we? We can stop the car and
turn back, if you’re so keen. Look, if it’s only for the children’s sake,
it’s worth it… don’t you reckon? Come on, Ian. That’s a good boy. There’s a good lad. Come on, then. Come to the next one. Come on, Ian, you throw, then. Let’s go and play soccer, Lynda. Now give it to me! Here, gotcha! I’ve got you! Drop it! Drop it! Drop it! Round and round and round…. Come on, Ian, kick us a goal, then. Come on Ian, kick us a goal. Come on, then. Margaret, catch it! Oh, I’m no good at catching. Come on, Lynda. Come on, then. Catch it. Frank! Catch it! See, it’s easy. Come on, throw us a catch. Ooh! Now look who can’t catch! Come on, Ian. Come on, Ian. Come on, Ian. I’ll tell you. Catch this.
Ready? Catch this one. Wa-ay up in the sky. THE CHILDREN LAUGH We’ve lost the ball! Frank, take me with you! Lynda! Lynda. Lynda, stop waving, you’ll have
Mr Machin fall into the water. Oh, give over! Look, be careful! Lynda! Look, be careful, love. Mam did you see us. Whatever did you want
to go and do that for? I just wanted to cool off a bit. One, two, three… – Mam, mam, did you see us?
– Yes, I did. Come on, Ian. I’ll change my shoes. Go on, get it! He’s got done it! Machin! Come here! Hey, make a good job of it. Aye, Mr Wade. Come on, you two fairies,
let’s have you out of here. Why don’t you come in, Ken, and let’s
have a look and see what you’ve got! I’ll come in and show you
what I’ve got, all right. Come on, I mean it,
let’s have you out. Hey, have you got any more beer? Len, come on, let’s have
this hosepipe on them. Let’s have some cold water on you! Watch it, it’s freezing,
you daft frog, it’s freezing! Right on that body there! It’s lovely. Oh, that’s lovely! It’s beautiful. It was a good game, you know.
Oh, he’s got the makings… Isn’t that Frank Machin over there? Yes, it is, love. Fond of kids, isn’t he? It’s not quite how I pictured him. Right down the wing, you throw
an over head pass like that… – Ready, Frank?
– Aye, one moment. Have you seen Cleopatra? Well, she looks all right,
doesn’t she? Would you like to meet him? Yes, ask him over. Frank. Come over here a moment. The Emperor calls. Here, go steady, you bloody nut. Well done, Frank. Well done, lad.
And how are you feeling? – Champion.
– Good I’d like you to meet my wife, Frank. How do you do. Frank Machin. You’re one of the stalwarts
of the City, according to my husband. That’s a relief. Well, he doesn’t seem to
be a very sociable giant. He’s probably shy. I’ve asked my husband to introduce us
before, but he’s such a slowcoach. I like meeting his protégés
every now and then. I think he sometimes keeps
them too much to himself. All his stars. We don’t have stars in
this game, Mrs Weaver. That’s soccer. Well, what do you have, then? People like me. I’ve got a thirst;
I think I’ll be off. Glad to have met you. Goodbye, Machin. – Goodbye, Frank.
– Goodbye, Frank. You played a great game.
Now, keep it up, lad. Machin. You did very well today, young man. Thank you, Mr Slomer. Yes, very good try. Yes, very good indeed. Keep it up. Thank you, Mr Slomer. Come on. Watch the door. Hallo, Frank. Hi, Dad. ‘Walking back to happiness, ‘ ‘Oopah, woah, yeah, yeah…’ ‘Bid farewell to loneliness, ‘Oopah, woah, yeah, yeah…’ ‘I never knew I’d miss you.’ Hey, love… what d’you
wear when it’s hot? Where’s your husband gone, fishing? Aye, he’s left his bloody
bait at home, an all! ‘Making up for things we said, ‘ ‘…Oopah, woah, yeah, yeah…’ ‘And mistakes to which they led…’ Hey, love, show us your personality! Hey, Maurice, how’s that
tart of yours, then? – Who? Judith?
– Aye. Does she come across
with the old, er, one-two? Now, watch it, Frank. Just be careful whose bloody
coat tail you’re pulling. Oh, Maurice, you know
I love you, don’t you? I’m not your flag to wave
up and down the street! You need stuffing, Maurice,
you know that, don’t you? Women! Bloody women! ‘Walking back to happiness.’ ‘Walking back to happiness.’ ‘Walking back to happiness…’ ‘…again.’ Oh, here she comes. Hey, she’s brought
her mother with her. Hallo. Hallo, love. Er, this is the tart I
was telling you about. Oh, God, just listen to the
way he talks about me! I think I’ll come back
when you’ve done. Aye. You should have come
in a few minutes ago. How do, Judith. Oh, he has told you my name, then? That and, er, other things. Ooh, watch it, Tarzan. Oh, yeah… this is Pam. Hallo. How do you do? – Hallo, Pam.
– Hallo. I saw your try this afternoon. I got a good pass. Ooh, ain’t he modest! – Would you like a drink?
– Gin and orange. Gin and orange. – Judith?
– Gin and tonic, please. Gin and tonic. Hey, Keith? A little service, Keith.
Come on, a little service. And now, ladies and gentlemen… are there any volunteers? Is there
anyone at all that can dance, sing, hum, show their muscles, do a
striptease, fan dance or bubble dance? Come on, Maurice! Go on, Maurice, do a dance! I see we have a few of
our City heroes here tonight… including our old friend,
Frank Machin. Come on, Frank, give a song. Come on, Frank. All right, Frank? Right. Right. Pick your mike up. Right. ‘Here, in my heart, ‘ ‘I’m alone and so lonely.’ ‘Here, in my heart, ‘ ‘I just yearn for you only.’ ‘Here in my arms,
I long to hold you, ‘ ‘Hold you so near,
ever close to my heart.’ ‘So, darling… ‘…say that you care,
‘Take my love…’ ‘…I give gladly.’ ‘Surely you know…’ ‘…I need your love so badly.’ ‘Here in my heart.’ ‘My love and my all, dear.’ ‘Here in my arms… and stay here in my heart.’ Hey, come on, get the door open.
There’s not a bloody war on! I’m sorry I’m late. It’s all right. Hah, that’s all right, then. You’ve been drinking. Aren’t you going to
ask me how we got on? Why, did you play football
until this time, then? No. I’ve been out with the lads… you know… living. You must have had a hard time. As a matter of fact, we did. You’re drunk. You’ve come back here drunk. That’s no bloody crime. You’re not me mother…
me something or other. What are you getting on about? Sssh! I tell you… I’d like it a lot… if you’d let me call
you ‘Sunshine’, Margaret. ‘Sunshine’. ‘Sunshine…’ Ian! Don’t go getting it
all over your clothes! Lynda? Yes, Mum? Where are you, love? In the kitchen. Oh, that’s all right, then.
I just wondered where you were. Oh, I… I didn’t know you were in. I was just going to make up the bed. I’m off to work in half an hour. I didn’t hear you come in. I never know where I am, what
with the… children on holiday. No, Frank, no! It’s all right. Oh, no! It’s all right. Frank, no! No… Frank! Mam! Go away, Lynda. Go away, Lyn. What are you doing, Mam? Go on out to play, Lynda, love. Mam! Go away, Lynda. Go away! Oh…! You’re a man! You’re a bleedin’ man! Aren’t you going to say anything? You made a right bloody muck-up
of that loose forward! Aye, he won’t play
again for six months! Better watch out you
don’t get suspended! What else could I do…
what else could I do? Look, this big character comes around the
blind side every time there’s a scrum. I just stand in his way,
he’s never looking. ‘Stand in his way!’ I get me shoulder under his jaw…
booph! He goes down like a child. He did! I began to count the times
he came around that scrum. Fourteen times. I must’ve
hit every part of his face. You should have seen him.
Bradshaw, that’s the name. Aye, and the fifteenth time he came
round, they carried him off… flat out. He bloody were, an’ all! You could hear the
crack all over t’ ground. Aye, it just proves I’m a
good defensive player. Hello, Charles. Hello, Frank, how’s it going? Champion, Mr Slomer. Champion. I hope you’re not giving too
many trade secrets away. Have you changed your mind
about Frank, then, Charles? Oh, now, steady, John. When Weaver first signed him,
I thought we were making a mistake. But I don’t mind admitting it… this big lad gives me as much pleasure on
that football field as anybody can today. Mind you, it’s nothing like the old
days, young man… nothing like. Oh, no, no, no…’course not. I hear you… Hi, Ed. I’ve noticed my photographs
are getting a bit small lately. – See to it, will you?
– Now, then, tiger. And put a bit of a smile on
my face when I’m scoring. Hi, Maurice. What’s up with you, then? Nothing, I’m just waiting for Judith. Cop us two, Jack. I try and take my pleasures quietly. When I see those
frogs gathered around, I… just shoot ’em a line, that’s all. Oh, yeah… I brought you your
mail down from the ground. Half a dozen.
One a week’s about my record. Why don’t you bring that… woman of yours
down here some time… that Margaret? She wouldn’t come. Bloody school-kids! Why wouldn’t she come? She’s a home bird. Are you taking the jam out of somebody’s
sandwich without paying for it, then? Me? No, she’s a home bird.
I’ve just told you. Now shut up. Watch out with that tiger,
Maurice, he’ll snap your hand off. Oh, I can take care of him, Ed. Watch it. Hey, Maurice. Maurice. Have a read of that. Come on. ‘Dear Frank Machin,
enjoyed watching you play’… rare times I watch the game. Forgive me if… Perhaps you could drop by for
a drink sometime this week. Wednesday afternoon might be suitable.
Best wishes, Ann Weaver.’ Ann Weaver? You’re not going, are you? Read the P.S. ‘P.S. This doesn’t mean bring
any of your rowdy team mates.’ Is that meant to be a
joke or something? You’re not taking
it seriously, are you? Why not? I’ve got nothing to lose. I wouldn’t be so sure about that. She just thinks I’m
good-looking, that’s all. – Give us a kiss, will you?
– Don’t come with that, Maurice. Careful, Tarzan!
What’re you doing to him? Come on, I want some
husband left, you know! How d’you mean, ‘husband’? Why, hasn’t he told you?
We just got engaged. – Hey, shut up!
– Engaged? No wonder… no wonder
he’s been so rough! Eh, the Lord help you.
Give us a kiss, love. Congratulations, Maurice. When are they
going to start ringing them bells, then? – We’re planning on Easter.
– Oh-ho! Well, you’ll be laughing again yourself
when it happens to you, Tarzan. ‘When it happens to me’?
I’ll put up a bigger fight than that. No, they’re never satisfied,
are they, Maurice? Women! They don’t frighten me, Maurice… they don’t frighten me. Happy Christmas. Happy Christmas. Oh, we’re having a party on Christmas Eve.
You’ll be coming, of course? We’ve got a match Christmas Eve; it’s a
Saturday. But I could come on afterwards. Well, see you do, then. I suppose playing professional football,
you don’t need a full-time job? Not unless you’re
interested in the money. Are you, Frank? I like to put it to good uses. Like what, for example? Well, like helping people out,
things like that. Is that why you bought
such a big car? I must say,
you’ve been very successful. Well, it’s like this, Mrs. Weaver: you see
something and you go out and you get it. It’s as simple as that. You make it sound very simple. Do you like gardens? No. Oh, Frank. Have another drink. Help yourself. You’re not playing football
this afternoon, are you? No. I like you. You’re like a big cat. You’re always moving. I’ve never
seen anyone so restless. Come and sit down. I’m not so sure I should be here. Oh, Frank, don’t take
that silly attitude. Come and sit down. Nothing’s happened
to upset you, has it? No, nothing. There’s no need to feel awkward. I don’t know… Don’t talk. I think I ought to go. Oh, why? I thought you were
behaving so nicely. I don’t think it’s fair. Oh, ‘fair’! You’re not feeling… you know…
out of your depth? I might be. Well, there’s no need,
you can see it… It’s not Mrs Hammond, is it? Mrs Hammond? The woman you live with. I lodge there. Whatever way you
like to put it. Is it her? I’ve been thinking about Mr Weaver. Oh, I see. I think I’ll go. You’re going? Look, I think that… There’s no need to explain, Frank… You don’t seem to understand… Either come in, or go! Say it… say it, say it,
say it, say it… Say it! Why don’t you say it? Say what? Say you’ve got some feeling for me. Frank, I can’t. Not yet. But you know me,
and how I’ve been to you. I can’t let my feelings go. Not again. Not to have them cut
off like Eric and… everything gone in one person,
and… and dead. You’ve got to give me time, Frank. There may not be enough of
us left to enjoy it by that time. Oh I don’t know… You might just want to
hear me say it. You… You… might feel that’s all
you wanted, and go away. But you keep fighting me. I can’t be that bad. When are you going
to give us some peace? I come upstairs with you, don’t I? But you make me feel I’m buying it,
I’m just buying, and I’m not! Well, that’s me. That’s how I am.
I’ve nothing more to give you, Frank. – You don’t mean that.
– I wish you wouldn’t work me up like this, telling me how I should feel.
If only you’d leave me alone a bit…. You’re so… big, Frank, you’re so stupid.
You don’t give me a chance! Oh, my God… Maurice. Mauri… Well, Machin. What do you want? Hallo, Frank.
Come in, we won’t eat you. Well, Gerald, aren’t you going to
offer a drink to this wild young man? A whiskey will do. Mrs Weaver. They’re making a lot
of noise downstairs. Last time I open my house to this crowd.
Every scruff in town seems to be here. You’ve been in the wars
this week, young man. I’ll be all right. I’ll be all right. He’ll have to learn he has to
pay something for his ambition. I think it spoils his looks, though. Does it hurt, Machin? No. I don’t feel anything. Take no notice of ’em, lad. Mr Slomer’s your newest fan. You seem to have the kind of
charm that appeals to him. I’ve noticed I’m not the only person who’s
found something of interest in Frank. What do you mean by that? Well, Gerald, there was even a time
when you were very impressed by him. I carried that boy. It was on my back, nobody else’s. Are you trying to tell me that
you’ve carried me, or something? Yes… from the very beginning. I’ve played myself into
that crumby team. But you just don’t appreciate how
much help you’ve had, Frank. Look, am I a good
footballer, or am I not? The only reason you’re in that team now
is because Mr Slomer wants you there. Oh, come now, Ann. Anyway, I think Frank’s
had enough for one day. Oh, I see by my onion it’s 11:30. Time to be going. I like to see Christmas in at home. Don’t bother to come down. The young man ‘ll see that I don’t get
into any trouble from your revellers. Merry Christmas. Tell me, Frank… have you been indulging in what I call ‘Mrs
Weaver’s weakness for social in formalities’? Is that your business? That’s for you to decide. No. You’ve been having a good
season so far, Frank. – Until today.
– Huh? Until today. Oh! I see what you mean. Still, false teeth can be better looking
than the real thing sometimes. What do you think mine are? They look very neat. Are they false or real? False, but they could be real. They’re false. You’re in a tricky position
with Weaver, you know. I know he hasn’t liked me for a bit. He thought he had some
sort of ownership over you. He just doesn’t like
to see it taken away. Still… you’ll be all right as
long as I’m there. Do you understand what I mean? Aye. Right. Well… I wish you Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. You’re Frank Machin, aren’t you? You look different on the field… like a tiger. You look pale. Aren’t you well? Am I a good footballer? Let’s go upstairs and
find an empty room, eh? ‘Oh, he’s a jolly good fellow.’ ‘For he’s a jolly good fellow.’ ‘For he’s a jolly good fellow… and so say all of us.’ ‘And so say all of us.’ ‘For he’s a jolly good fellow.’ ‘For he’s a jolly good fellow and so say all of us.’ ‘And so say all of us, and so say all of us.’ ‘For he’s a jolly good fellow.’ ‘For he’s a jolly good fellow…’ ‘…and so say all of us.’ Hip, hip! Hurray! Hip, hip! Hurray! Weaver… you’re a fifth-rate gutless quack! ‘…He’d kick hard, and I’d kick hard,
we’d all kick hard together…’ It’s late. Have you only just got back? Frank, are you all right? Aye. Aye. I see you’ve had a visitor. Two. Nobody you know. Who might that be? Don’t get so hoity. Just because you don’t
know everybody in my life. It was Eric’s sister and her husband. I didn’t know he had one. Here. What do you think of that? What is it? Is that… is that you? It was before I met Eric. When was that, then? Oh, just at the end of the war. We worked in an ordnance
factory, making bombs. You should have seen us. All women. We had some times. You weren’t married then? No. Had some chaps, though. We had some good fun together. Aye… I bet you gave
them a right run around. Tell no stories, tell no lies. Good God, Frank what have you done? I-I don’t look too good, do I? I’ve aged ten years… d’you reckon? What have you been doing? Have you been fighting? No, I got them broken.
The dentist pulled out the bits. Six bits, ten guineas. I’m in
the wrong bloody business. It’s spoilt your looks. So I’ve been told. By a girl? Who else worries about me? You went to Weaver’s, then? Aye. You look ill, Frank.
You oughtn’t to have been out. Here, what am I going to do… with the, the presents for the kids? Go on, go on, go on. Well… I’ll take them up with me
and put them in their stockings. And I’ve… I’ve got
yours here, an’ all. You shouldn’t have bothered. D’you want it now? What is it? Well, take it. No, no… leave it till the morning. Don’t spoil it. Will you put the light out? I’d never have guessed
you made bombs. Why… why don’t you come to bed with me? It’ll be cold and I
need looking after. Thou knows Mother always
goes to bed with Santa. All right. But just for Christmas, mind? All right, I’ll make it… five quid. Oh, watch your step, now. Five quid? Come on, it’s only money. He’s worried. You’ve got
him worried, Maurice. ‘Course, he’s a family
man now, you know. Aye, but whose bloody family? Stuff it, love, or I’ll belt you
right across that back seat! Now, now… just because we’ve
got Frank in a corner… All right, Maurice. We’ll see what you’re made of. There’s ten quid there. – Oh, bloody hell…
– Stop the bus, I’m getting off here! I though you said you
were a friend of mine? I am a friend of yours… I’ve given
you all the money, haven’t I? All right, I’ll see you for ten quid. What have you got? Nothing much. Two pair… of kings! Bloody hell! I’d have bet the whole
stinking bus on ’em! I’m not greedy, Maurice. Thirty quid’s enough. She’ll murder me. Who, Judith? – She bloody will an’ all.
– Tell her it went to charity. You lucky bleeder! Is that what you call it? It bloody is. – Come on, Ken, do you want a hand?
– I might as well. I hope you know what
you’re doing with the cash. I can take care of it, Len. Aye, but can it take care of thee? Get stuffed, love. Margaret! I’m coming. Come on down, I’ve got
something to show you. We won’t be back
too late, Mrs Farrer. Oh, all right. Look here, why don’t you pop
out and get yourself something? It’s all right, Mr Machin. All right, I’ll leave it
here for you, then. Here she is. Do you like it? It’s beautiful, love. Oh, thanks. Wait a minute, wait a minute… What? What’s the mat… Let’s put this on, just for a change. Oh, no, Frank. It’s yours. It’s here,
it’s nobody else’s. Don’t be so silly, Frank, it… I want you to have it. Look, it won’t bite. Frank, I can’t! Well, I can’t wear it. Now, come on. Come on. Oh… Just for tonight, then. Aye. Just for tonight. At least that’s a start. Erm… we won’t be back late, Mrs Farrer. All right, love. Bye-bye for now, then. Ta-ra. Bye-bye. I’m afraid this
table’s reserved, sir. Hah, you’re right, it is reserved. For us. I’m sorry, sir,
there is a nice table… Look, why don’t you get lost, love? We could have gone to another table.
He was only doing his job. His what? You call that a job?
Traipsing about like a fifty-year old tart? Oh, thank you. Good evening, madam. Oh, good evening, Mrs Weaver.
Mr Weaver. Nice to see you again. – Hello, Tom. Keeping well?
– Very well, thank you, sir, and you? Er, will you be going straight in,
sir, or will you order in the bar? Yes… yes, I think we’ll
have a drink first. Good evening, madam. Hello, Bruce. And to follow, madam? Er, bird? Duckling’s
nice this evening. Or meat… a nice steak? Er, have you any roast meat? Roast beef, madam. Yes, and… some vegetables? Cauliflower and roast potatoes. Thank you very much, madam. And for you, sir? Well, let’s have a look. I’ll have, er… a nice piece of steak… blood rare
some cabbage and some potatoes. Er, no soup, sir? Aye, I’ll have some soup but
make sure there’s plenty of it. Thank you very much, sir.
Er, anything to drink? – Yes, I think we’ll have…
– I’ll send the wine waiter over, sir. Well, what the bloody
hell did you ask me for? I bet he comes back with a
bit of fried egg and bacon! Watch you don’t burn his
whiskers, love! Ha, ha, ha! You shouldn’t have come here if
you’re going to behave like this. We’re paying for it aren’t we?
That’s all they’re interested in. No, it’s not. But if you’re
going to act like a pig… Well, if I’m a pig, what’s this load
of fat bastards around here, then? Frank, I’ve told you. Now, enjoy yourself…
that’s what this place is for. I know how to handle these people. How’s it going, love?
Have they burnt your custard? Really! These old ladies,
you know they’re a bit past it. …well, he didn’t know
quite what to say. – Would you care to order now, sir?
– Oh, thank you. Mrs Weaver. Your table is already
reserved for you, sir. Thank you very much, Thomas. Isn’t that Frank Machin down there? I don’t think she’s getting
quite what she expected. No… but then,
does anybody with Machin? Give us the bill, love.
We’re leaving. Yes, sir. – Can I have the fur coat, please?
– Yes, madam. Poor thing, I feel
almost sorry for her. Is there anything wrong, sir? I don’t mind paying for what we haven’t
had, but has he added it up right? I don’t think your mate’s
very good at his sums. I don’t think there’s
any mistake, sir. – Are you sure, now?
– Quite, sir. Right. Good, I just
wanted to make certain. Er… this is for your trouble.
Be careful how you spend it. Thank you, sir. Hello, Mr Weaver. Good night, Mr Machin. That was Mrs Weaver,
wasn’t it, at the restaurant? Aye. Aren’t you friends anymore? Who with? Them. No, I… I’ve got no need for them. Are you coming up? Yes… in a minute. Well, Frank,
they’ve got a nice day for it. Aye. Are you feeling fit for Saturday? – Champion, Mr. Slomer.
– That’s the way. We can’t manage
without Frank, you know. Congratulations. I hope
you’ll both be very happy. Aren’t you going to kiss her? Go on. I won’t be a second, Margaret. Congratulations, Maurice.
Best of luck. Look after her. Thank you very much. Well done, Judith. See he keeps up to it,
and no backsliding. Frank. Thanks, Frank. Oh, hello, Mr Slomer, how are you? Margaret! What’s the matter? Why’d you run off like that? In front of all those people, and… that young girl. It makes me ashamed. Ashamed! I’m a kept woman, Frank,
how else do you expect me to feel? Oh, my God. It’s no good, Frank. That car, me all dressed up in a fur
coat, living in the same house as you. If you deal with dirt,
you look dirty. People have got eyes, you know. Oh… You feel like dirt? What do you think? It sounds like you want to shove
me off to some other woman. I don’t need to do that, do I? From what I hear,
you’re never short of girls. Well, if you think that,
why do you stick with me still? I reckon you’ll leave me soon. Well, that’s the first I’ve
ever heard of it; me leaving. I know how you are. I thought you were
beginning to feel happy. Happy? I could say something there,
but I won’t. Well, go on, say it. I’d like to hear you say it;
I’d like to hear you say all of it. You don’t understand at all, do you? You can always sell it if
you’re so sure I’m leaving. You can open a shop soon with
all the stuff I’ve bought you. You’ve given us nothing
you haven’t had to. You don’t seem to understand the
reason I’ve done these things for you. Of course I do. It makes you
feel good, it makes you feel big. You know how you like to feel big. You don’t appreciate one bloody
thing I’ve done for you. I’ve given you a life! A life better than any other woman
in this street, but you will not admit it! Admit it? You must be mad.
I can’t lift my head up in the street without somebody pointing at
me and saying I’m your slut! Who says that? ‘Who says that?’ Just listen to him!
They all laugh at you, they all point you out, don’t you
know that? Trying to be different! And they point me out too,
and Ian and Lynda. We’re not proper people
now because of you. Because you show off every Saturday
in front of thousands of them, because you’re… you’re just
a great ape on a football field. Because you want me to be like them! You want me to crawl
about just like the rest. Well, just have a look at the rest.
Take a right good look at ’em. Take a right good look at the
bloody people round here. There isn’t a bleeding
man amongst ’em. You’re flat on your backs,
and the world crawls above you! Because they haven’t the guts.
Do you understand that? They haven’t the guts to stand
up and to walk about like me! Shout as much as you like,
but just get out of here. I don’t want you in my house anymore. You know you need me.
Why don’t you admit it? Leave me alone! I won’t leave you alone,
not until you admit it! Margaret, what’s the matter?
Margaret? Leave me alone. Aren’t you well? Can’t you get it into your head? We don’t need you. I don’t understand her. I don’t understand what
she wants from me. ‘A great ape on a football field’. That’s what she called me. A great ape on a football field! That’s about what we are, isn’t it? She makes me feel like that. She makes me feel clumsy… awkward, and big, and… stupid. She makes me feel like… she makes me feel like… I crush… I… I crush everything. Maybe you’re too rough on her.
Some women can’t stand it, you know. Hallo, Frank. Hallo, Maurice. I say, you took a bit
of a knock last week! I reckon it takes
something to lay you out! Aye, see you do better next Saturday! That’s what they think of me, isn’t it?
A great ape on a football field. They want someone to act big, because they haven’t got
the guts to do it themselves. They want a hero,
and I am; I am a hero. But she won’t admit it. Do you understand that? She needs me, Maurice,
but she will not admit it. That’s all right. But you can’t
be like that to a… to a woman. Maurice… Maurice, I’m… I’m not going to be a
footballer forever. I need something… for good. Something permanent. And you reckon it’s her? Grab my hand. I can love someone, can’t I? I can, can’t I? I can. Perhaps she’s the wrong one. I need her. She’s the one thing that
makes me feel wanted. I can’t lose her. You’d better see a doctor. I’m just tired. Are you going now or in the morning? I’m not going at all. What is it you want to make you go? I want nothing that you’ve got. I’m staying. Thank God there’s one part of
my life you’ve never touched. You mean Eric? He’s the one thing you can’t touch.
And he’s the one really good thing. Well, let’s all get down on our knees and
pray for the good soul of Eric Hammond… the father of this house! How he must hurt you! Well, come on, come on, then… let’s put
his bloody boots right back in the hearth! You don’t know. You don’t know.
You don’t know. If I’ve seen a crazy thing
in my life, that’s it. I know enough about you to keep you in
a rubber room for the rest of your life! You know nothing about Eric, or me.
You know nothing about Eric! I know he put the file
through his guts. And you made him so happy,
he went and killed himself! Do you want to kill me? Eric is dead, you understand?
Eric is dead. You make me feel I’m nothing. – I want you.
– You want to crush me, but I won’t let you. Because I’m the one
thing you can’t have, like everything else! – I want you.
– I want you to go. I need you. I want you to go! I want you to go!
I want you to go… Get out! – Margaret.
– Get out! Oh, please! Please, leave me alone. I can’t. Leave me alone. I can’t. I can’t. I love you. I want you to go! All right, I’m going. And that’s the last you’ll ever see. You’re not in any trouble, are you? Oh, I’ll take your word for it. Don’t mind who I take,
I’m not choosy. But any trouble and no, thank you. That’s why I gave you that queer
look when you came in just now. I always give that look when I
think people might cause trouble. I find it puts them off. Does Johnson still live here? He went a while ago. This is yours. You’ll be all right here, Whacker. You got a lock on that?
You’ll be all right. These two alarm clocks are nippy,
but they’re nice when you know ’em. Down here for a holiday? By the by, is that
your car out there? I meant to tell you, Whacker,
the nippers are mustard round here. It’ll be all spare parts if
you leave it too long. If you want it cleaning
I’ll do it for a dollar. You’ll be all right, now…
you’ll be all right. Come on, then…
let’s get you to bed… Is that you? Is that you, Frank? You dirty bastard! Mr Machin? Mr Machin. If it’s Mrs Hammond, she’s been
taken ill. She’s in the hospital. I’ve got Lynda and Ian with me. What? Mrs Hammond… she’s been taken ill. What is it? It’s an attack. Some sort of an attack. I’ve got Lynda and Ian in with me. Where is she? It’s the County. It were just a couple of days, I… She’s badly. It’s a haemorrhage on
the brain, I’m afraid. Is that serious? Serious? Oh, yes, it’s serious. I mean… she won’t die, will she? I’m afraid I can’t say. She’s weak; she’s weak all through. To be frank, she hasn’t the strength. And, more important, I doubt
if she even has the will. Where is she? I think you’d better leave
her now, Mr Machin. Margaret. Margaret. Margaret, it’s nothing. It’s nothing at all. It’s nothing, Margaret. You’re all right. You’re… you’re all right. You’re going to be
all right, Margaret. You’re going to be all right now. You’re sa fe. You’re sa fe, Margaret. Margaret… You… can’t go like this. You can’t leave me. You mustn’t be mean. Margaret. Margaret, you can’t leave me. You can’t. You mustn’t be mean, Margaret. Doctor! She’s gone. Sorry. No. No, she’s not. No! Margaret. Oh, Margaret… Margaret! Come on, Machin,
get a bloody move on!