Russia Is Fired from the 2018 Olympics

Russia Is Fired from the 2018 Olympics


LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THERE WAS SOME BIG BREAKING
NEWS TODAY. RUSSIA HAS BEEN BANNED FROM THE
UPCOMING WINTER OLYMPICS FOR THE USE OF PERFORMANCE ENHANCING
DRUGS. AND THIS IS NICE. RUSSIA WAS ALSO BANNED FROM
PARTICIPATING IN THE NEXT PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION. ( LAUGHTER )
OLYMPIC OFFICIALS FIRST GOT SUSPICIOUS THAT RUSSIANS WERE
USING PERFORMANCE ENHANCING DRUGS WHEN THE RUSSIANS SET A
NEW SPEED RECORD FOR SKIING UP THE MOUNTAIN. LAUGH
THEY WERE BANNED FOR TAKING STEROIDS. WHEN THE RUSSIAN WOMEN’S FIGURE
SKATING TEAM HEARD ABOUT THIS, THEY WERE LIKE, “STEROIDS? WHAT DO YOU MEAN STEROIDS?”
( LAUGHTER ) BUT THIS IS NOTHING NEW. RUSSIANS ARE KNOWN FOR USING
DOPE TO BEAT THE SYSTEM. IN FACT, THEY’RE STILL USING
THIS DOPE. ( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE ) MEANWHILE, THERE’S MORE NEWS
FROM THE TRUMP RUSSIA INVESTIGATION. IT WAS ANNOUNCED THAT DONALD
TRUMP’S FORMER CAMPAIGN MANAGER PAUL MANAFORT, WHO IS CURRENTLY
UNDER HOUSE ARREST AS PART OF THE INVESTIGATION, HAD VIOLATED
HIS BAIL TERMS BY– GET THIS– CORRESPONDING WITH RUSSIAN
INTELLIGENCE. NOW, I’M NO LAWYER. BUT HERE’S WHAT YOU DO WHEN
YOU’RE UNDER HOUSE ARREST. YOU DO PUZZLES. YOU BAKE. YOU WATCH EVERYTHING ON YOUR
DVR. HERE’S WHAT YOU DON’T DO:
THE THING THAT GOT YOU UNDER HOUSE ARREST! ( LAUGHTER )
DON’T DO THAT! MANAFORT HAS HAD SO MUCH CONTACT
WITH THE RUSSIANS, TODAY HE FOUND OUT EVEN HE’S BEEN BANNED
FROM THE UPCOMING OLYMPICS. ( LAUGHTER )
IN OTHER NEWS, YESTERDAY, DONALD TRUMP WENT TO UTAH AND
SIGNED PROCLAMATIONS TO REDUCE THE SIZE OF TWO PROTECTED AREAS,
WHICH ARE BASICALLY LIKE NATIONAL PARKS. HOW DARE DONALD TRUMP STEAL THIS
LAND FROM THE AMERICAN PEOPLE… AFTER THEY RIGHTFULLY STOLE IT
FROM THE NATIVE AMERICAN PEOPLE! ( LAUGHTER )
IT’S AN OUTRAGE! YOU FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE WITH
THAT, DON’T YOU? ( LAUGHTER )
I’M BRITISH, I CAN SAY IT. I UNDERSTAND. YOU’RE, LIKE, I GET IT BUT IT’S
TRUE. ( LAUGHTER )
THIS IS SOME BAD NEWS FOR DONALD TRUMP,
TWITTER ANNOUNCED ITS LIST OF 2017’S MOST RETWEETED POSTS,
WHICH FEATURED THREE FROM PRESIDENT OBAMA AND NOT ONE FROM
PRESIDENT TRUMP. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
WHICH IS KIND OF A BUMMER FOR TRUMP. BARACK OBAMA BEATS HIM AT THE
ONE THING HE’S GOOD AT. ( CHEERING )
TRUMP LOST OUT ON TWITTER’S LIST OF THE YEAR’S MOST POPULAR
RETWEETS. BUT TODAY HE CLAIMED HE STILL
WON IN THE RETWEET ELECTORAL COLLEGE. ( LAUGHTER )
TRUMP DEFINITELY TWEETS MORE, SO I WONDER WHY OBAMA’S TWEETS WERE
MORE INSPIRING. LET’S SEE, ONE OF OBAMA’S
BIGGEST TWEETS LAST YEAR WAS: “THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING. MY LAST ASK IS THE SAME AS MY
FIRST. I’M ASKING YOU TO BELIEVE– NOT
IN MY ABILITY TO CREATE CHANGE, BUT IN YOURS.” AND ONE OF TRUMP’S MOST
RETWEETED TWEETS LAST YEAR WAS “FIDEL CASTRO IS DEAD!”
( LAUGHTER ) EQUALLY MOVING BUT IN DIFFERENT
WAYS. ( LAUGHTER )
AND FINALLY, WE HAD TO SHOW YOU THIS. A EUROPEAN FASHION COMPANY IS
SELLING A GIANT SCARF THAT COVERS YOUR ENTIRE BODY. TAKE A LOOK. LOOK AT THIS HERE. ( LAUGHTER )
IT’S THE PERFECT GIFT FOR PEOPLE WHO LOVE SWEATERS BUT WISH IT
MADE THEM LOOK MORE LIKE THEY WERE BEING DIGESTED BY A PYTHON. ( LAUGHTER )
IT’S THE PERFECT SCARF THAT SAYS, IN FIVE DAYS, I’LL TURN
INTO A BUTTERFLY. ( LAUGHTER )
THIS SCARF ANSWERS THE QUESTION, WHAT IF THE ENTIRE OUTFIT WAS
THE DIRTY SOCK? ( LAUGHTER )
IT’S THE SCARF THAT SAYS, “LOOK AT ME, I’M READY FOR WINTER!”
AND ALSO, “LOOK AT ME, I’M AN UNCIRCUMCISED PENIS!”

100 Replies to “Russia Is Fired from the 2018 Olympics”

  1. I dont know if i should be sad or happy as a figure skating fan…..but when you looked back to sochi scandal……south koreans must be overjoyed

  2. Just have sports contests where tests for doping don't exist. May the best cheater win. Oh, don't call it a sport but have fun if you can.

  3. Блять ну мне говорили,что американцы тупые,но чтобы настолько…

  4. Dear lord, relax people! It's a prank the man's a talk show host! He's making fun! …like he basically does about American culture and society, as well as his own home country, on a daily basis! Those of you expressing outrage about this "oh so disrespectful" monologue please make yourselves familiar with the meaning of comedy, also journalism, in an actually free country! Humor, particularly a somewhat dark, sarcastic humor like James', is always a matter of taste of course, however in the end, what that young English comedian represents up there is called social criticism, both a basic right, a privilege and a major duty of any modernday, democratic society!
    So come down, please! Like the comedic style or not, you can't expect such viral news concerning a fairly relevant issue of the day to remain untouched by America's leading talk show hosts!

  5. Ohhhh yeaaaah russians are so stupid, they take steroids. (Sarcasm) You’re so glad that they were banned. Please sing in car. Politician is not funny.

  6. I love you James, but that was so rude and wrong. I'm not from Russia, but I support the Russians! They are great and deserve to represent their country at the Olympic Games!

  7. Politics is everywhere, even in sport. Never mind, shitmericans, we'll show you. Instead of the banned Russian flag and anthem, everywhere will wave the red flags and sound the Internationale in case of victory. And don't be afraid, China will probably ban USA and South Korea in 2022 too 😉

  8. Okay…DEAR JAMES CORDEN! I really luv your shows, but it was very rude. VERY DISRESPECTFUL. I feel myself so mad, and my blood is boiling. You must remember and always keep that in mind – you have billions of people watching u, around the world. Please be loyal. Please be tolerant. I am so disappointed in you. Политка никак не должна вмешиваться в Олимпийские игры.

  9. So you used this situation with olympics which brings so much pain for all Russian athletes and people for silly jokes and ratings..now I have to ban myself from watching your program.

  10. And just today about 30 russian sportsmen were acquitted of all the charges. But now they are kind of lack on time and there are not high chances that they can go to Korea. So what did IOC is total bullshit. Everyone know it. Everyone know why.
    They have thousand of sportsmen who are, I guess, disabled from birth, cause they all have asthmas and other bad diseases so they have to eat steroids and meldonium and other tasty things all the time. But for some reason they are not banned, their countries are not humiliated.
    Now we will see, how they will officially give medals back to Sochi 2014 winners. O no, we won't, they will do it quietly without any news, right? Not like the time, when they demanded to take them back.

  11. First time I make the "unlike" for the video.. My name is Anastasia and I am from Russia. James Corden is one of my favourite USA TV hosts, I really adore "Carpool Karaoke". Here really I was disappointed, I'm sorry… You tell the things you don't even know
    about properly. By the way, today CAS has confirmed guiltlessness of 28 blaimed russian athlets for using stimulants. And there will be more, cause we just have started. James, please, do not make your show cheaper than you can really make. Let's make everything clear! Love.

  12. Clap for the guy who spent 10 trillion in his first year call for the guy who was the liberals puppet. Clap for the guy who now has scandals under his belt because of his staff

  13. The putin scum are all over theze comment boards supporting the asshole putin doping up the russian athletes at Soshi !

  14. The political decision of the IOC, taken without any evidence under the pressure of the CIA! How about the fact that half of athletes from the US officially use strong drugs for WADA? My other question, do the WADA and IOC officials think that all people on the planet have completely forgotten how to think and understand? I am sure that the lawsuits that will follow after such a discriminatory decision by the IOC will financially ruin it. Sincerely I wish this because sports and politics are not compatible!

  15. Let s just give all medals to usa, and then maybe the rest of planet will have opportunity to play spot. Usa is like a giant bully baby taking all the toys in Kindergarten. It is not fun any more.

  16. And the big steroid nation 👉America👈 can participate in the olympics games (they are clean😂😂😂😂), this world is a f***k joke. I will not watch that game it's not even trying ti be fair, but I did enjoy watching the open ceremony. I guess it will help the Americans win alot of gold that they can get only if the Russian's are weak/absent, because normally they can't get alot of gold in winter games because there is not alot of black Americans to help like in the summer games. Canada and the rest of the theifs will get to shared the left over.
    It's Democrasy Olympics 2018

  17. You think you are funny?!?! If you just try to think a little, not just follow the main streem, you will clearly see, that this is just politics. You embarrased yourself sooo much… Infact there is a good side – now the whole world will see who pays for the IOS and what a "democratic" institution they are. Greetings from Bulgaria.

  18. dear Russian people!it's comedy!stop this #norussiannogames hash tagging!your government did something wrong!please accept it!p.s i'm not American….

  19. depends who owns the doping checking i guess the International Olympic Committee concluded that there was doping in some athletes but NO actual State Sponsored doping, yet Russian state flag is banned.
    yea sounds about right
    I say western NATO bias Dope testing and results based on compliance with global policy's

  20. Dear James, that was not funny…that was rude and mean. Politics just ruined lives of innocent athletes. How can you joke about that?

  21. And you make fun of Russian athlete? Very disrespectful. If you want to chasing your stupid president, just do it! Don’t involve with others.

  22. You know , you hate Russia because you will never be like Russia .
    Stupid country with the president who can do nothing 4 his people By the the way In the Girls skating Russia was and will be the first . You are so stupid that even don’ t have American coaches in figure skating Because they are originally from Russia You by yourself can do nothing only laughing that is what you can do Big Pigs Штампы блять яйцоголовые

  23. A fat English homosexual….well you should be proud of your fish and chip country where the most popular name is Muhammad.

  24. bringing politics into the olympics is not fair to the russian athletes, no solid proof of doping and shouldnt be held against the present athletes

  25. Banned? And Olympic athletes from Russia on that games are coming from Saturn? I like him, but he is bad in politic matters…

  26. Little do you know many olympic athletes have used doping in their lives, yet russia was banned because of allegations that theirs was from the government. their unnecessary sanctions weren't working effectively, so what other way could the west pressure russia if not ban them from their athletes and more importantly countries pride. Its sad that this is just the beginning of the bullying story, and when russia has enough of it there sure will be a nasty war for the us

  27. From Pyeongchang misleading – someone was running around town drunk with a bear singing "Oh a frost a frost" and beat the muzzle to the Americans. But we could not identify, because the man was with a neutral flag!

  28. This is disrespectful you guys always say how we need to make peace and love each other like I’m Russian and this is disgusting

  29. 0:30 … I mean I know he's only "joking" but he should definitely take a closer look at Alina, Zhenya and Maria… just saying O.o

  30. VERY disrespectful to mention figure skaters who obviously worked hard their all life. Zagitowa and evgenia deserved to represent Russia for their medals. No way figure skating has anything to do with doping. No wonder why you are losing popularity these days

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