*Music* *Ominous music* *Vehicle running* You wanted the 50 milligrams? I’m here to buy Mega Man… Oh, right. Right, right, right. Eh? Oh Ah, nah, huh Money first. Uhhh Ha, ha, man, ha, ha *Race Drivin’ Intro Music* Race driving came out on the SNES in 1992 in North America. Apparently, it got a PAL release, but I can’t find a release year for it. It was a port of an arcade game of the same name by Atari which was released in 1990. The arcade version of the game doesn’t look that great today, but if I saw it in 1990, I probably would have thought otherwise. Sure it’s blocky and primitive by today’s standards, but it looks perfectly playable, and I probably would have tried if I saw it in an arcade. This video’s not about the arcade version, of course, but I thought you should see what this game SHOULD look like. The game got multiple console and computer releases throughout the early 90s on everything from the Amiga, to the SNES, to the Genesis, to the Game Boy, and even got a Sega Saturn release in Japan. Race driving was ported to the SNES by a company called Imagineering. In my opinion, this is the worst of all the ports right here. Which isn’t to say the other ports or even the arcade game are very good, but the SNES version is just so bad. I think I’d rather play the Game Boy version over this. Remember F-Zero? I did a video review on it not too long ago. It’s fast, fun, has amazing music, looks great, and never drops any frames. Well, Race Drivin’ has a grand total of zero of those qualities. With F-Zero, Nintendo knew what the SNES could and couldn’t do and made a game around that. I’m not even convinced that Imagineering even knew what a SNES was, judging by… well everything about the game. Hey, Frank, what is this thing? Shut up and get back to work, ya lazy bum! Let’s just start with the name, Race Drivin’? Why not Racin’ or just Drivin’? Race Drivin’ just sounds wrong, like “Y’all go an get your dang ol’ pickup truck an we’ll go Race Drivin’, I tell you h’wat” Maybe whoever came up with that name was just trying to sound young and hip, But just failed? I don’t know. I don’t blame Imagineering at all for the name though, because this is what Atari called the arcade game in the first place, But it’s still an awful name. Also. What’s with the cover, art this doesn’t represent how it feels to play the game at all. It should be more like this… Now onto the game itself, I’d say “Let’s talk about performance” here, But it’d be more accurate to just say “Let’s talk about”, since the game seems to lack any performance at all. What even is this? Didn’t the developers at Imagineering ever hear of a little thing called a framerate? And if they did didn’t anyone ever tell them that it needed to be higher than 3? Also, the framerate isn’t even consistent. Then the graphics themselves are also a joke. I mean just look at this. Then there are spots where the game can’t render the strip of road shortly ahead until I’m about to drive on it. So I can’t see the road ten feet in front of my car. How on Earth did this even get past testing? And then there are pointless extra graphics which help bog down the game. Barns, cows, signs. Seriously, I don’t have to slow down to 40 to make this turn. Not to mention the loop-de-loops and jumps. This game couldn’t run well without all that crap, let alone with it. The devs needed to make the actual driving part fun, look good, and run well before adding anything extra, But they didn’t. The gameplay exists, I guess There are three tracks to race on, which I’m guessing is supposed to be like easy, medium, and hard. The controls are terrible and super touchy. I don’t even feel like I’m in control. Also, if you hit anything, except for a sign, even at low speeds, your car crashes and explodes. And then no matter what I do. I can’t get past this one loop-de-loop on the Super Stunt Race track. Actually, that’s not entirely true. While recording more footage for the game I realized you’re actually able to drive around the loop-de-loop, which I really don’t think is what the developers had in mind But considering that it’s like impossible to even get up the loop-de-loop, that’s the only way I was even able to do it. This game is at best a tech demo showcasing the SNES’s native 3D polygonal graphics capabilities, or lack thereof. And you know how I criticized F-Zero for being one player only and not having a lot of replayability outside of its challenging difficulty? Race Drivin’ is also one player only, But I use the word “player” lightly since it in insinuates the game is actually playable. It also has a lot less replayability than F-Zero. F-Zero has 15 tracks to improve your score on, while Race Drivin’ has 3. And why would you even want to improve your score? What would you even want to play this game in the first place? Go outside, or read a book, or go intern at your local state senator’s constituent office! Or you could even… Next up is music. Let’s see, we have a game of barely any performance and barely any gameplay, so you guessed it, there’s barely any music. Nothing even plays when I’m driving, just during other parts of the game like the title screen and when I get a game over. *Music* Maybe that’s a good thing, because what music is there is mediocre at best. So I’ve basically done nothing but call the game crap for this whole review, But isn’t there anything I like about it at all? Well. The HUD is ok. The dev’s got a lot of the little details there right. The visor is there and textured, the mirror looks good and actually works to some degree so you can see cars behind you, and the dashboard looks good enough with this metallic-looking texture. The thing is, this is just honestly what I would expect from a first person game that shows inside the car. This isn’t even that exceptionally cool or anything. But it’s still probably the best part about the game. Still even the HUD is flawed. Everything but the speedometer, tachometer, fuel light, and gearshift are purely for decoration; I’ve never seen anything else move. Everything else just clutters the HUD and I wish it wasn’t there. And then you could also say that the HUD majorly obscures your view of the track And it should be much smaller, like in other versions. However, by covering up a lot of the track, the game does have less to render, and as bad as the performance is, maybe it should be covered even more. I dunno. There is one other thing I like about Race Drivin’, and that’s the instant replay that replays your cars crash in slow motion But it can’t kind of be frustrating if you’re actually trying to play this game And the game openly mocks you with that time after time, But it is kind of funny, considering how big of a joke this game is. Atari’s ambition with this game is admirable Tasking Imagineering with putting a 3D game on the SNES, all without enhancement chips, and in 1992! I really wish I could say the game is better, But the fact is, and this should have been painfully obvious to everyone that had a hand in bringing the game to market, The Super Nintendo just wasn’t powerful enough for the game they made. So while I do appreciate that at least Atari was trying something different, They never should have released this piece of garbage. Could you imagine how disappointed you would have been if you got this game for Christmas as a child? “Talon you were so bad this year, Coal was too good for you. Have a copy of Race Drivin’ instead. – Santa Claus” if they would have only utilized the SNES’s capability to use enhancement chips in game cartridges, I think Race Drivin’ would have been much better, but for some reason they didn’t. Probably to save money But I don’t think anyone outside of those who made it really knows for sure. Race Drivin’ may not be the worst SNES game I’ve ever played. Oh wait. It is. Seriously. It’s worse than Bill Liambeer’s Combat Basketball. It’s worse than Mario’s Time Machine. It somehow manages to get everything wrong. I feel bad for everyone who ever bought this game expecting anything more than a broken, ugly mess. I feel bad for any programmers who were assigned to work on this atrocity and actually tried their best. If you want to play this game to see how bad it truly is, like I did, it goes for about $5.50 as of November 2017. And by that, I imagine Pricecharting means you’ll probably be paid $5.50 to take someone else’s copy off of his hands. If you want a good racing name for the Super Nintendo, Buy F-Zero or Super Mario Kart or Top Gear or so many others. If you want something to punish your kids with when they’ve been bad, then get Race Drivin’. If you’ve made it this far, thanks for watching. As much as I love talking about good video games, it can be fun to do videos on awful ones and warn others about them. Let me know in the comments what your least favorite Super Nintendo game you own is, And if you aren’t already, please consider subscribing to my channel for more videos like this. And a huge thanks to my friend, Daniel Loyd for helping me make this video. He did cinematography, camerawork, acted in it, helped me edit it, and I really couldn’t have done the video without him. Later And save… *phone rings* Enjoying the game? I don’t know who you are. I don’t know where you live. I don’t really know anything, actually. But what I do know is that I have a certain set of skills and, uh, stuff, that make me a slight inconvenience for guys like you. If you give me my money back, that’ll be the end of it. But if you don’t, I will find you, and I will get my refund. Well, good luck with that, man. 20 minutes later *Knocks* Hey, Billy… KO! Perfect!